Redemption

I am not sure which category in Literotica that this story best fits. As I usually use the Fetish section I will do so again here. While D/s does play a significant role in the story and there is a bit of fetish, this is mostly a story of love ... lost, damaged, and maybe found. For those readers looking for quick action and heavy kink, this might not be your cup of tea. For those for whom it may be, I do hope you will read and enjoy it. If you do, I would also greatly appreciate hearing your thoughts about it after, either in the comment section or in correspondence. Thank you.

*****

Redemption

Sitting on the couch in the living room Dan continued to stare blankly at the wall across from him, as he had been doing for the past hour, as indeed he had been doing for increasing amounts of time far more frequently of late. He finally roused himself to get back to his chores. It would be what she would want, although there was much less housework to do these days. It had been over two months now since his Wife, and Mistress, had passed away, far too young in her mid forties, after a horrific and hard fought battle with cancer.

Theirs had been an idyllic relationship and marriage, first and foremost as loving wife and husband, but, as they had come over time to see and understand their complimentary natures, they grew and embraced their other roles with each other as well, she as his benevolent but all powerful Mistress, and he as her devoted and ever obedient slave. Though they kept this part of their lives entirely private and known only to themselves they were no less dedicated to it. And it continually enhanced their already deep love and commitment to each other.

They had met when she was a young aspiring but as yet unpublished novelist and he was a new low level junior agent at a large literary agency. She had written a novel, the first is what she hoped and planned to be a series. But with no track record, and only a cursory appraisal of her work by more senior and experienced agents, she was assigned to him. He quickly recognized, as others hadn't, the great potential of her story, but was even more taken with her. As she did not yet warrant a formal editor he took on that unofficial role as well, politely making a number of significant suggestions for changes, which as he was so obviously enthusiastic and excited about her book, and which upon reflection she did realize strongly improved her story, she went ahead to make.

Still, as she was an unproven entity, and he had little standing yet in the industry, they found it difficult to get a foothold and fair reading at any of the major publishing houses. As the rejections kept piling up he refused to give up for her, and he eventually came up with a proposal which, if it became known that it had originated from him would likely seriously jeopardize his job, he presented to her anyway. He urged her to self publish her book on the internet which was a developing modality and vehicle for new and unknown authors. When she expressed reservations that she had no knowledge or experience in navigating the technical aspects of that realm he assured her that he did and would be happy to do so for her, outside of his official duties as her agent with the firm. As she was becoming increasingly discouraged by her lack of success so far, yet continuing to be buoyed by his ongoing support and confidence, not only in the book but in her, she reluctantly agreed.

After his normal day job hours Dan worked tirelessly on the project. He extensively researched which would be the best electronic publishing venue to use for the book, and then submitted it. He went on to design an elaborate author website for her and a separate web fan club, filling both with effusive reviews and praise for the book sent in by him and as many friends and relatives that he could enlist. He also posted comments about her story an other authors' websites, trying to achieve as much exposure for it as he was able.

None of these efforts would have mattered much if the book wasn't any good. But it was. It was very, very good, with a unique flavor of eroticism rarely if ever seen before in mainstream literature, coupled with a crackling romantic adventure narrative that ensnared and entranced. Before long, as word of web spread, reader numbers began to steadily climb as did the number of now unsolicited exemplary reviews including more than a few from already established writers. After six months the book had worked its way up onto the e-print best seller list, and when she soon after posted her second book in the series it became an instant e-book best seller, rapidly advancing up to #1.

This success did not go unnoticed by the major publishing houses, all of whom began to contact her to negotiate for the rights to her entire series in their traditional print medium. As she was still technically represented by the Literary Agency they brought her in and indicated to her that because of her success she now needed and would be assigned to a far more experienced and senior agent. She replied in no uncertain terms that she wanted to continue on with Dan. As they were unaware and ignorant of the unauthorized role he had played in her ascent they were incredulous at her demand and informed her that as he had achieved so little, not only with her account but with others to which he had been assigned, that he had recently been let go from the firm. While she had not known this, and was a bit wounded that he hadn't told her, she retorted to them that this served her purposes perfectly as she was severing her relationship with the agency and that Dan would now serve as her exclusive agent.

When she later apprised him of her action he tried to convince her that she was making a mistake and that she would more greatly benefit from a more heavyweight and influential advocate. Nonsense, she responded. They were a team and were in this together and she intended that it remain so. It was at that moment that his prolonged infatuation with her, almost from the first moment that he had met her, became one of undying love.

He tried his utmost to keep his feelings for her well hidden. She was beautiful and vivacious, so confident and strong, and he was none of the latter three and only average looking at best. And she was a rising star and growing celebrity in the literary world, and he would do everything for her to have that continue to be so. She was so far out of his league that he was terrified that if he reached for anything beyond their working relationship, no matter how much he might yearn for it, he would lose what he did have with her. He worked diligently on her behalf and soon gained a hefty six figure advance for the third book in her series, and separate six figure contracts for the rights to the dead tree editions of her first two books as well. When her third book was finally published, to almost universal acclaim and enthusiastic popularity, she was well on her way to high fame and resultant fortune. And she couldn't be more proud and professionally happy.

Despite his best efforts at remaining in shadow, over time Maureen became increasingly aware of his amorous affection for her. And she came to realize more and more how desirous she was becoming to reciprocate, and wondered at his reticence to act upon it. As she got to know him even better she began to understand why and, strangely, this attracted her to him all the more. Finally one evening, on the pretense of having him to her place to go over the details of the publicity campaign for her latest book, she figuratively took the bull by the horns and declared to him that the time had come for them to become a team in more intimate ways as well. His head snapped up as he thought that she most definitely had to be playing with him. But as he looked into to her confidently smiling face, her unyielding gaze bore down deep within him to captivate and capture his very being. And for the first time, but most certainly not the last, he utterly and joyously submitted to her will. Not so very long after they were married.

Dan was a continual whirlwind of emotions as he couldn't quite bring himself to believe in his exceedingly good fortune, so he strove mightily every day to justify and prove himself worthy of it ... and of her. He did all that he could, both big and small, to make her life easier and more comfortable. For her part Maureen reveled in his constant catering and pampering of her as she reasoned that she worked more than hard enough on her writing to not also be burdened with all the mundane and menial every day tasks. So why not have him be responsible for all the daily household chores and duties as long as he was happy doing them. As he certainly seemed to be. And so their lives settles into a contented and mutually agreeable routine.

As time went on though Maureen began to more actively contemplate this particular feature of their relationship. There was no doubt that their love for each other was the prime and firm foundation which bound and held them together. But she began to be enamored with the idea that this other aspect might not be an important part of their attraction, and whether they ought to examine it more fully together to see if it might enhance what they already had. So one night after he had finished cleaning up after another of his delicious dinners she asked him to get them both a glass of her favorite wine and join her in the living room. Once they were both comfortably settled she announced that she wanted them to have a full, frank and honest discussion about their own personal deep wants, needs and desires, both for themselves, and from each other.

Surprised, unsuspecting and unprepared, and even more than a little fearful, Dan was initially hesitant and reticent, so she took the lead. Beginning slowly and cautiously she treaded superficially at first but then began to delve more deeply, discovering, uncovering and revealing so many things that she had kept secret, even from herself. Emboldened and stimulated by his wife's outpouring candor and sincerity he began to admit and expose elements of his own spirit which he had always kept hidden from all. Now out in the open and in full view they were both astonished and amazed at how closely their inner natures fitted and complimented one another. They both continued on to a point of exhilarating exhaustion, and while they had detailed so much, both large and small, the essence of it all came down to two simple truths ... Maureen was driven to rule ... and Dan so wanted to be ruled, though only by her.

They then acknowledged what almost of a certainty had to come next. Without the need of any written compact, nor a plethora of rituals and protocols, though some would be employed and enjoyed, they knew that while they would always be, in all circumstances, a loving wife and husband, they now in the privacy of their own relationship would also live as ... a Mistress and her slave.

She quickly took to frequently refer to him affectionately as 'my slave', and he thrilled just as often to answer to her as 'Mistress'. As with any couple there were still times of disagreement although they never any longer degenerated into fights, as her word had become law and his sole response became unquestioned obedience. This did not mean that she did not want his thoughts and opinions, which she always found valuable and wanted him to openly express, and which she also knew would often help guide and influence her. But final decisions were now solely hers.

Still, there were times, especially early on, when discipline was called for and required, and in her now voluminous readings on the web for educational purposes about 'dominance and submission' she discovered that many if not most web advisors felt that such should be corporeal in nature. She found this abhorrent and vowed never to use any such means. She could never physically hurt someone whom she loved so dearly. Instead she chose to discipline him by expressing her extreme disappointment in his actions and banishing him from her presence for however long she felt it appropriate. This proved for him to be the worst punishment that he could face.

Their sexual life also became more vibrant and exquisitely fulfilling. On their night of enlightenment they had also been stunned by how closely their self confessed fantasies, kinks and fetishes meshed so well, and they quickly began to incorporate, explore and experiment together with each and all of them. Their new paradigm, to which they both became fully committed, was that such endeavors would from then on be exclusively focused on her pleasure, while his would be of no considered consequence. They engaged in such quite frequently, always at her initiation, and he strove continually to find and perfect ways to propel her to ever higher frenzied and unrestrained heights and climaxes, usually numerous times on each occasion. Often, as she approached her final zenith of ecstacy she would, only after her express permission, allow him to simultaneously share in that orgasmic joy together with her, because doing so immensely pleased her as well. This was often ... but not always, as she felt that unpredictable denial helped to keep him on his toes as to where his real attention and purpose lay. This was not really necessary, as pleasing her to her ultimate was his own greatest pleasure, and any other that she might deign to bestow on him was an added bonus, for which he always offered his most heartfelt gratitude.

And so their lives progressed. In the outside world she was an ever more successful and acclaimed writer and he was her astute and stalwart business manager. With their many friends and relatives they shared countless and enjoyable times and every day activities and experiences. They were felt by almost everyone to be fun loving, generous, loyal and most of all the perfect example of a loving wife and husband. In the privacy of their home they were all of that and so much more. The so much more was as a caring Mistress and devoted slave. And the years rolled by as they continued to live in such wedded bliss.

And then the illness struck.

At first they were both terrified but the doctors sought to reassure them that it could be managed, controlled and even possibly overcome, and for a time it was. But then it recurred, beginning a series of relapses and ever shorter remissions as she suffered through too many courses of chemo and radiation therapies. As she grew weaker and more dependant Dan was with her every moment of the way, getting her to every appointment, brainstorming with each and every doctor searching for new strategies forward, and at the same time seeing as best as was conceivably possible to her ever more increasing physical and emotional needs. Despite his all consuming efforts she continued to fade and he couldn't help the feeling that he was failing her. When she sensed this she tried to make it clear to him that this was in no way so.

Her one major goal, once it became apparent that this was no longer a fight that could be won, was to finish the 10^th and concluding book in her singular series. She labored harder and harder every day and in the end Dan, who knew her style and mind as no other, filled in what gaps that she was unable, and collaborating together they finally finished it. When it was done she said 'enough'. No more treatments, no more struggle. What time she had left would be spent in restful peace and comfort with her husband, who was never as glad or appreciated more that he was also her slave. They spent many hours on their veranda overlooking the lake on which they lived, he sitting on a chair next to her medical recliner, sometimes conversing, sometimes in silence, but always holding hands. One evening, as they watched the sun set, her favorite time of the day, he felt her squeeze his hand. Looking over to her he saw that her eyes were closed but there was a hint of a wistful, even hopeful smile. Her squeeze lessened ... and she passed on.

********

Dan finished his vacuuming, which actually hadn't really needed to be done. As he began to think of what further chores he could do, anything to stay busy and not again start staring mindlessly at the wall as he had been doing far too often, the doorbell rang. In the first month he had received a large number of phone calls and visits from well wishers but this had thankfully lessened significantly during the second month such that it had dwindled down to only three texts in the most recent two weeks. So the ringing doorbell came as a bit of a surprise, especially as most visitors usually called ahead to announce their intentions to visit. What shocked him even more as he opened the door was the person standing on the other side.

"Donna" he exclaimed, more uncertainly than he would have liked.

Donna had become his wife's best and closest female friend over the last number of years. She was a layout editor at one of the more popular women's magazines and the two had met when the magazine was doing a lead feature article on Maureen. The two of them had instantly clicked and before long were on the phone constantly with each other as well as doing all sorts of activities together. These never included Dan. After some period of this he timorously asked his Mistress one day if he should be jealous. "Only of my time." she had answered with a grin and twinkle in her eyes. "Never of my exclusive amorous affections."

On those few occasions when they were all together, Donna, while superficially polite, always remained cooly distant and guarded with him. He had finally asked his wife again, this time why it was that Donna didn't seem to like him. More seriously on this occasion she had replied the it wasn't him, but that Donna had 'issues', and had left it at that. Donna had visited Maureen often in the last days and he had always left them alone together. But he hadn't seen her since the funeral, when, after offering him some quick words of condolence she had hurried away as if she couldn't get out of his presence fast enough.

"May I come in?" she asked, finally breaking the awkward silence as they stood at the front door.

"Um, yes. Of course. Please do." he stammered, stepping aside so she could enter. After another moment of hesitation he led her into the living room where they continued standing several more long seconds until he finally invited her to sit.

"Can I get you something to drink?" he asked, not knowing what else to say.

"A glass of water would be nice." she replied, also seeming to search for a way to proceed. He rushed into the kitchen and brought her back a glass of ice water that he handed to her as he remained standing.

"Is there something else I can do for you Donna?" he finally asked, perplexed.

She looked down at her hands and then back up at him. "Could you also please sit down." she asked, seeming a bit flustered and making it clear that she was uncomfortable with him hovering over her. Never wanting to cause anyone distress, especially someone who apparently already held him in low regard, he did as she bid and sat down across from her. And waited.

She took a deep breath. "Dan," she began, "the last time I was with Maureen she made a request of me. She gave me something to give to you after she was ... gone." He immediately wondered what it could be and why Maureen hadn't just left it for him with the same instructions. "I thought I would wait a bit to bring it to you ... to give us both a little time to adjust and get settled." In actuality she hadn't wanted to come at all, and had thought often of just sending it to him. But Maureen had been adamant that she deliver it in person and stay until he was finished. It was her best friend's last living request of her and she really couldn't bring herself to refuse. But it had taken her this long to comply, particularly as there had come one other request that had followed, one to which she didn't yet know how to respond.