How to Fill an Empty Nest Pt. 01

There was no doubt in her mind how much she missed her little girl, it just felt so empty in the house without her. Her husband's caring and compassionate presence did nothing but infuriate her because he couldn't fix the problem. In fact every time the two of them were alone and he wasn't looking she would glare at him and wonder how she had married such a pathetically weak man. She knew that was ridiculously wrong too because Jack had been her rock when they first got married.

He had been her liberator and her lover, the man who had helped her throw off the chains of mental slavery her parents had put on her. Unfortunately that was all in the distant past and those memories failed to assuage her feeling that he was supposed to fix the fact that Katie was now gone from their house. She had no idea how he was supposed to do that and knew it was an irrational belief but it still stuck in her head.

She wondered if maybe he had put a little more pressure on her to go to school locally that she might have caved in. She also knew how selfish that sounded because like any mother she wanted nothing more than for her daughter to achieve her dreams. It wasn't Katie's fault that she had held on to the same dream since she was little. She wanted to make movies, not act in them but make them. She had gone to the movies with her parents and had always seen the smiles on people faces as they left. She wanted to be the one to make them smile like that so that led her to her current place in life.

Unfortunately for Donna that meant going to a school that specialized in film and of course the most prestigious one on the east coast was NYU. She thought that it could have been worse, Katie could have wanted to go to a west coast school and that probably would have killed her. It was bad enough right now, the last time she had seen Katie was one weekend two months ago. That didn't even really count though because she had come home with Trish so they could both visit their parents. She had only gotten one night with her daughter because even though they were home the two young women weren't going to sit home on a Saturday night.

She remembered pouting like a little girl when she thought she was alone over the fact that Katie wanted to go out instead of staying home with her, never mind with her father. Katie had seen her alone in the kitchen and asked her what was wrong. Donna had been honest and tearfully told her how much she missed her and how she was disappointed that she was going out that night.

Katie had countered her by also telling her mom how much she missed her too. Then she had shocked Donna by actually telling her that she should come out with them for the night. It could be more like a girl's night out then mother and daughter. Unknowingly to Katie her heart at leapt at the idea but she quickly squelched her own excitement by telling her daughter that her and Tricia wouldn't want a mom around to cramp their style.

Katie had told her that she could just forget the mom part for the night and come out and have some fun with them. She had come up with another excuse about not believing she had anything to wear that didn't scream soccer mom. Since they were the same size almost Katie had offered to loan her some clothes but in the end Donna had stayed at home.

Now as she sat on the edge of the bed she found herself wishing she had gone with them that night. She needed something to put some spark of youth back inside herself and her daughter had offered her the opportunity that night she had just chickened out. So in thinking more about her situation she started to realize it was actually a combination of things that might be responsible for her mood.

She missed her daughter more than most parents did; she also missed her youth and the excitement it always seemed to contain. She knew that in a way Katie represented that lost youth, especially since she looked so much like Donna did when she was eighteen. She should have gone with her and Trish that night and let herself bask in the atmosphere of excitement that always surrounds two eighteen year old women out for the night.

She wondered now if she could have done that and gone out with Katie as her friend and left her mom hat home. As she thought about it she wondered how she would have felt if Katie had as they said nowadays 'hooked up' with some young stud. She wondered if it would have been weird seeing her daughter actually making out with a man in a setting like a night club. She was still sitting on the edge of her bed as she wondered how it would feel to watch him paw her little girl's tits while they made out. She wondered if Katie would feel funny about doing that in front of her.

Somehow she didn't think Katie would hesitate mainly because of the closeness they shared. She was surprised to find that her current train of thought was making her moist between her legs. She hadn't masturbated in almost a week and knew that she was long overdue. She could possibly have sex with Jack tonight and think about watching Katie and her imaginary man but decided against it because she just wasn't attracted to her husband right now.

As she sat there and fantasized about her daughter being naughty in front of her she remembered the night Katie lost her virginity. She had come home and Donna had been waiting for her. It had been horrible emotionally for her daughter but she said she had enjoyed it physically. She remembered probing Katie for details and picturing her with her legs spread with a young boy inside of her. She had told her she was just making sure it had gone okay physically but inside she knew it had turned her on. The idea of her little daughter becoming a woman had turned her on. She never admitted that to her and then had suppressed her fantasy until right now when it came back to her.

Now that Katie was living with Trish she wondered just how active her little girl was in college. She knew from their still intimate talks when she was home at Christmas that she had no interest in a long term relationship. So Katie had told her that she had enjoyed a number of boys and then hesitantly and softly told her she had enjoyed a few women too.

Donna had tried not to appear shocked and thought she had done a good job of it too. There was something off by the way Katie had admitted to sexually experimenting with other women. So Donna had asked if she enjoyed being with another girl, Katie's reply made it emphatically clear that they weren't girls they were women. She told her mom sheepishly that her taste in women happened to run in a more mature direction. Donna of course had no idea then that her own daughter was feeling her out to see if she would take the bait.

Even now while sitting and thinking naughty thoughts about being a voyeur watching her daughter the statement about Katie liking mature women never clicked with her. She had no idea how close Katie had come to outwardly trying to seduce her own mother that night. She also had no idea that was the reason that Katie had been home so infrequently since returning to school in January.

She was however enjoying the little fantasy pictures in her head involving her daughter. She was enjoying it so much she found her hands gravitating towards her pussy. Before she knew it she was rubbing herself quite vigorously through her panties. Then she was inserting fingers into her now wet pussy, first one then two then finishing with three.

She was pushing them in and out while whispering her daughter's name and giving her imaginary directions of what to do with the boy she was with. She was telling her to wrap her legs around him as he pushed inside her and giving her pointers on how to push back. She whispered to her imaginary Katie that she should take him in her mouth and suck him till he filled her mouth with his delicious juice. At the thought of that she exploded on her bed with an orgasm the intensity of which she hadn't felt for years.

Afterwards she lay there and it washed over her that she had just masturbated using her daughter as her subject. She couldn't even lie to herself and think it was the guy she was doing in her fantasy because in her mind she had been focused on Katie not the guy. Surprisingly she seemed to feel no guilt about using her daughter's body as the tool to mentally get herself off. She also had no idea that she had just torn down a barrier in her own mind that would change her life forever.

At around 7 that night Trish came crashing through the door carrying two big bags of Indian delicacies from nearby Indian row, a one block collection of Indian restaurants that was part of the lower east side. Their favorite was a place they had nicknamed 'Indian Disco" because of the multitude of lights strung around the restaurant. Thousands of Christmas lights and odd decorative lights covered every inch of the ceiling and walls. It was like the effect of being in a discotheque while eating.

It wasn't the lights that kept them going back time and time again though, it was the food. It was the wonderful combination of delicious and affordable at the same time. Even though money had never been an issue in either her or Katie's lives their parents had done a good job teaching them the value of a dollar.

Katie had inherited her love of food exploring from both her parents but especially her mom. Trish was grateful for that now because it was always Katie that was introducing her to new and exciting things to eat. In the few months they had lived together she would swear that they had probably toured the world in food. It was one of the wonderful benefits to living in Manhattan, there were offerings from almost every national cuisine in the world to be found if you looked hard enough.

In fact where they lived right now was easily within walking distance of Chinatown, Little Italy and the remaining Polish and Ukrainian restaurants that were leftovers from earlier days in the neighborhood. Add to that their favorite Indian place and there were four food cultures within a stone's throw.

Trish was so happy to have Katie as a friend because they just seemed to fit together so well. The bonus of being her roommate in one of the hippest places in all of Manhattan to live was amazing. Unlike Katie's parents who had enjoyed a bohemian youth living in the city, in this very neighborhood also, her parents were lifelong Connecticut people. TO them the city was a wonderful thin to be enjoyed but in small quantities. Living there had never attracted them or so Trish thought but when she would go home and tell them about life in the city her mom would seem to get a look in her eye. It was not an envious look but more like the look of someone who wished she was living in her daughter's place.

It was always Joanne that would be pushing her for more details on how she and Katie spent their time. She wanted to hear about all the restaurants and nightclubs they frequented. She had been so interested a few times that Trish even started bringing home cd's of up and coming bands that were always playing the small clubs. She wanted her mom to share her fun too so it was the least she could do for her.

As she was thinking about her mom her thoughts turned to Katie and her mom Donna. Her mind had been troubled all day after the uncharacteristic blowup between her and her roommate. When she heard from Katie that Donna is going through a rough patch at home it bothered her. Donna was like a second mom to her and so it bothered her like she thought it should bother Katie. Katie told her that her dad thought it might have to do with missing her daughter. It made sense to her because of how close the two of them were. So she had suggested going home for a couple of weekends to spend time with her. She was shocked to hear a string of what were bullshit excuses come out of her friend's mouth.

She wasn't a confrontational person by nature but she also wasn't shy to call bullshit on someone if she felt she was being played. It was the first time ever in her friendship with Katie that she ever had to call bullshit. She left her friend and a few minutes later Katie had chased her down and hinted at something that kept her from going home to visit. Something mysterious and troublesome enough to make her lie to Trish about why she didn't want to go home.

They had agreed to meet up tonight with some wine and Indian food and Katie was going to explain it to her. Katie made it even more strange and ominous when she told Trish that afterwards she hoped that she didn't find her disgusting or hate her. She had drawn her own conclusions after that and they had been rattling around in her head all day. She was sure it was going to come down to something like her having been molested by Jack.

The thought was too terrible to contemplate because Jack had always seemed to be the perfect father. Of course she could be jumping to conclusions but something was keeping Katie from wanting to go home and comfort her mom. Well she knew she would find out very soon and she started laying out the food on the coffee table. She got plates and silverware and set things up with big spoons so they could share. Eating Indian food was similar to eating Chinese food to the two of them. No one ordered their own items it was all supposed to be shared.

So as she was opening the containers on the sweet smelling Basmati Rice and all the main courses she felt her stomach rumbling. There was creamy lamb korma, s mix of stewed lamb cubes in a mild creamy yogurt sauce, Chicken Saag, another mild dish that was chunks of chicken in a pureed spinach style base, and then there was the lamb vindaloo the fieriest of the three. Of course there was also the breads, three different kinds and the samosas to start with. They always bought more food then they could eat so they could enjoy it the next day.

She had just finished laying everything out and looked at her watch and wondered where on earth Katie was. She was supposed to be here by now and Trish was getting pissed mostly because she was dying to eat. Then the door opened and in walked her gorgeous roommate. She was carrying the wine in one hand but that wasn't what Trish was focused on. It was the amazingly full nipples of her roommate that were pushing out the t-shirt she was wearing; she had obviously gone out braless once again.

Trish was always telling her that she was going to cause people to get hurt by doing that. Katie's tits were amazing and if you had to narrow it down to one feature that was her best it would be them. They were 34dd and so perfectly shaped that they almost screamed out to people to grab them. It had been a challenge for Trish to keep her hands off them too. That's why she would never make Katie quit playing their little game of titty twister because every time she was able to tweak with those nipples it made her wet.

"Jesus Christ Katie one of these days..." Trish started to say.

"Yeah, yeah yeah...i know you've told me a million times. You know Trish if I didn't know better I would think you have a thing for my tits? Is there something you're not telling me?" Katie teased.

Trish as usual got flustered as Katie's innuendoes and kicked herself once again for not having the courage to make a move on her best friend.

"Ok enough about those two lumps on your chest, we need to talk about your mom. Sit and eat with me I'm starving," she said as she started making both of them a plate.

They just ate their food for a little bit and drank some wine, when they were full they both put their plates down and sat back. Katie knew it was now or never but she knew it was important that she share this with someone. The guilt she had been carrying around about her strange feelings for her mother was now affecting parts of her life. She knew that Trish was right this morning and that her first thoughts should be about going home to spend time with Donna but she was so nervous. She just didn't feel like she could trust herself around her without exposing how she felt.

"Well Katie you've had me worried all day about what this big mystery is. I hope it isn't what I've been thinking all day because it would be so terrible for you. I do want you to know though that I'll always be here for you no matter what you tell me tonight." Trish said while laying her hand on her best friends arm in support.

"Don't be so quick to make a commitment like that till you hear what I have to say. I mean I've never told anyone what I'm going to tell you tonight because I'm so afraid of being seen as a monster."

Trish was almost sure she had pegged it right after all what else could it be. Her father must have made some kind of move on her and she's afraid to go back there now.

She pulled her friend in closer and whispered in her ear, "You don't have to be afraid, none of what happened is your fault. You aren't the monster he is, I understand. I mean he's your dad and..."

Katie wrenched herself out of Trish's arms and sat straight up, "What are you talking about Trish, my father, what about my father?"

"Katie I'm not going to judge you but we need to get you some ..."

Katie burst out laughing loudly, "Oh my god do you ever have the wrong idea. You couldn't be further from the truth then what you're suggesting. Trish my dad is so into always doing the right thing how could you ever think he would...touch me. Wow I don't even know how to tell you what is really the problem," Katie said as her laughter died down.

Trish was confused and slightly embarrassed to have assumed such a horrible thing about Katie's dad. She was even more confused because she couldn't think of a single thing else that would keep Trish away from home.

"I'm so sorry; it's just that I haven't stopped thinking about this morning. I mean why on earth would you lie to me with such crappy excuses to avoid going home to help your mom? It must be something terrible and I can't guess so please tell me, let me help you."

"Oh Trish I wish you could help me but you can't I'm dealing with something I've known for quite awhile now. I've never shared this with anyone because I've tried to lie to myself too and bury it deep inside. I knew the last time I went home I couldn't hide it anymore and rather than hurt someone I've chosen to go home as little as possible."

Now Trish was really confused, Katie was saying she didn't want to go home because SHE was afraid of hurting someone. What on earth could be eating away at her so badly to keep her from the home she grew up in?

"Tell me Katie, dammit we might as well be sisters as close as you and I are. Let me help you maybe between the two of us we can come up with an answer."

Katie poured herself another glass of wine for courage and passed another one to Trish. Then she gripped her best friend's shoulders in both hands and looked her right in the eyes and uttered the words that might destroy their friendship.

"It's my mother Trish, I want to fuck my mother, I want to lay her on her bed and do everything another woman can do to her!"

Trish shook her head because she wasn't sure she had heard her friend correctly. She thought she heard her say something about fucking her own mother.

"Wh...wha...what did you just say... I mean..."

"I knew it, I'm a fucking monster but I said I want to fuck my mother Trish and it's becoming an obsession when I'm around her. I want to eat her cunt and rim her ass, I want to put a strap-on around my waist and fuck her better than my father probably ever has! Do you understand how fucked up I am now, I can't control it either. The last time I was home she was brushing my hair as usual and I almost turned around and threw her on the bed."

Trish sat there in shock not knowing what to say to her best friend's sordid confession. Boy did she have the problem wrong she thought to herself. She knew that Katie was wild sexually but this was over the top dirty and forbidden. It was incest the same forbidden act she was worried that Katie's father had committed with her, except now her friend turns out to be the one who wants to do it to her own mother.