Jansen Twins - Holiday of Discovery

"She's ok," the doctor replied. "Please take a seat though." Darren reacted to the doctor's calm manner, sitting, not knowing what other option there might be.

"Beth is ok," the doctor re-iterated, "But she's lost the baby. I'm sorry."

"Lost?" Darren asked, stunned by the sudden and matter-of-fact way in which the statement was delivered.

"Yes. Do you know who the father is? Beth wouldn't say. She's understandably very upset."

"No," Darren lied, his head spinning out of control.

"Ok, well, we're going to keep her here under observation, is there anyone else that we should notify?"

"No. Um, no, I'll take care of that," Darren muttered. "Can I see her?"

"Yes, not for long though. She's been sedated and she's sleeping, but you can go in and check on her."

Darren's feet felt like lead as he shuffled in to see her. She was sleeping, but her face was very pale. He took her hand and just held it, sitting, trying to come to grips with the fact that the baby was gone. He felt guilty. Part of him was relieved that it had happened and removed a whole set of challenges he wasn't sure he had been going to cope with. He hated that weak part of himself and wished that he could provide better for his sister and lover.

He wasn't sure how long he sat there, but all too soon a nurse came in and tapped him on the shoulder, letting him know that he needed to leave now, that they would take care of Beth for him and that he could come back the following day when she was awake.

Darren was back at the hospital as soon as he was allowed the following morning. As he stepped through the door, Beth burst out crying, the sight of him setting her off. He crossed quickly to her bedside and she held her arms out, taking him within them. He'd been scared that she would blame him, that she would see him as the enemy. She was simply too torn apart to think in those terms though. Having Darren there was the first thing that had provided any sense to her situation.

"It's gone," she cried moments later when she was composed enough to at least get those words out.

"I know," he replied, careful not to sound like he was taking a position on whether that was a good or a bad thing.

"I'm so fucked up Darren. Part of me is just relieved. I hate it. I wanted to meet our baby, but I was so scared of what we were going to do that I a horrible part of me is relieved that we don't' have to go through with telling Mum and Dad and everything. I'm such a horrible person!"

"No Beth, you're human. I go through it to. I've been up all night wondering what it would have been like to have a child with you, feeling those same emotions. I've never really taken a position on abortion but I knew that I couldn't have ever asked you to do it. If you'd decided to, I would have supported you, but I probably would have been disappointed. I don't' know Beth, maybe this is for the better? All I know is that I completely understand some of what you're going through.

They held each other, careful not to be too close with the nursing staff about, but being there for each other.

~~~~~~~

Days later, back at home, Beth and Darren had to face the fact that their parents would be home the following day. They'd continued to use their parent's bed, Beth not wanting to be alone, but other than some affectionate kissing, the week had been nothing like they'd expected.

"What do we tell them?" Darren asked. It was the same question that they'd asked each other a thousand times.

"A half-truth," Beth sighed. "There's no way it won't come out, they'll hear about it somehow no matter how we try to hide it. We tell them that I was pregnant and that I miscarried. We don't tell them who the father was." Beth sobbed. Darren held her and she snuggled into the safety of his arms.

~~~~~~~

Torrid didn't begin to describe the weeks and months following telling their parents. Beth's refusal to give up the father's name nearly drove her dad from the house. Her mother struggled desperately with the fact that her daughter hadn't trusted her enough to confide in her. They'd told their parents that Darren had only found out whilst they were away and as a result he was seen as a loving, caring brother who'd done everything he could to help his sister.

Beth accepted an offer from a school across the country and there were many heated discussions about whether she could be trusted, whether it was the right thing for her to do and all manner of other things that had more or less bearing on the situation. Ultimately it came down to the fact that she was an adult and could choose her own path with or without her parent's support.

Thankfully, in the end, they chose to support her, aided by the fact that Darren decided to accept an offer to the same school. Knowing he'd be there to keep an eye on Beth seemed to tip the scales in favour of her going. Only just though.

~~~~~~~

"You're very lucky to have such an amazing brother Beth," her father said as she packed for college.

"You know, I actually agree Dad."

"Please look after yourself ..."

"Dad, it's ok. I've learnt a very hard lesson this year. I will be making smart choices, I promise." Her father crossed the room and folded her in his arms.

"I trust you Beth," He said, his eyes locked on hers. "And remember, no matter how bad it gets, your mother and I love you. It's been a tough time for us as well, but we've grown too. You and Darren mean everything to us and we will be here, no matter how bad and dark it may seem."

"Thanks Dad, that means so much to me."

~~~~~~~

"I can't believe you're coming with me!" Beth grinned at her brother. Darren was perched on the side of her bed, chatting as they waited for their parents to tell them it was time to leave for the airport.

"Where else would I go? You're the sexiest and most amazing girl I know. I can't risk someone else finding that out!"

"Yeah, well the only problem will be that we still share the same family name, so like, big secret time again."

"Well at least I convinced Dad that we should share an apartment off campus to keep you close to me and far away from the temptations of all those evil boys."

"It still boggles my mind. I laugh when I think about it. If they had any idea that you'd been the father..." She left the rest unsaid. "Of course we'll have to set up two bedrooms ... even if we only ever use one." Darren's eyes sparkled at the suggestion.

"Beth? Darren? It's time to go," Judy called from down stairs. Darren pulled Beth to her feet, hugging her and the pulling her into a long, deep kiss.

"Time for a whole new adventure!" he gushed as they headed downstairs.

END