Love and Trust

"You feel huge down there Peter. Are you? It didn't look that big when I saw it."

"I don't have anything to compare with so I can't say. I doubt it though. Average perhaps?"

"A little more than that I would say" Irina said "but not huge and certainly not so big that it causes any problems. Far from it if you just relax Petra. Don't focus on that now though. Get to know his body and let him discover yours. Take your time, there's no hurry."

Petra took a deep breath and let it out.

"I think I have to resolve this first of all." she told me "I can't ignore it right now. Do you mind Peter?"

I didn't understand what she hinted at but to me it didn't make much of a difference.

"Do whatever you need or want to." I told her therefore.

She released herself from me again and moved down my body. Soon I felt fingers touching my shaft and little head. The touch was very light and as a result my hips pushed forward automatically. That in turn caused the fingers to move away and she gasped.

"Sorry," I hurried to apologise "I wasn't prepared for that and the head is sensitive. Wet your fingers or stay on the shaft and it shouldn't be a problem."

"No. No, I just wanted to convince myself that it isn't gigantic. Now I see it is as I remember it from before."

She crawled back up and retook her position close against me.

"I'm silly, I know, but I have been taken by all sizes and it was never pleasant."

"Petra, I don't think the size is the problem, but if you are ready or not. The smallest dick would be uncomfortable if you're not ready to receive it, and being forced you wouldn't be."

"I think you are only half right there Peter." Irina commented "If those men had been interested in how it felt for us it would have been better at least but they didn't care about anything but themselves. Petra, let Peter lick you wherever he want, touch you wherever he want. Try it for a while and if you don't like it you can tell him to stop. Give it a chance!"

Another couple of deep breaths from Petra, then a sigh.

"Okay, do it."

With Irina I had teased and avoided her sex as long as I could. This time I did the opposite and went straight for Petra's labia. I wanted to convince her at once that it would be worth it.

Reluctantly she separated her legs when my hands pushed her thighs outwards, and her body tensed when I placed soft kisses all over the area.

"Oh no!" she sighed, but didn't try to stop me.

I kept at it until she relaxed, then separated the lips with my tongue. Once again she went rigid and caught her breath. A lick up her slit over the clit with a very moist tongue caused her to let the air out of her lungs and her thighs tried to close again. My hands and head prevented it from happening though.

Licking and sucking worked wonders. Not that Petra relaxed physically in any way, far from it, but it was the 'right' kind of tension. Her thighs and hips moved constantly, she arched her back now and then, her hands ruffled my hair, and she uttered the cutest little sounds.

Visits to her opening revealed that she got wetter, her lips swelled with blood from arousal. But, as with Irina, the orgasm eluded us. I was convinced it was close several times, but no.

"No more Peter!" she finally pleaded "Please stop and let me catch my breath!"

I didn't want to stop, not until she had come, but forcing anything was out of the question of course. Therefore I crawled back up her body to lay face to face and take her in my arms. She came to me willingly and Irina joined in from the other side.

"That wasn't bad, was it?" Irina asked her.

"No, at least not most of the time. In the end it felt as if I would be torn apart though and I got scared."

"I know what you mean Petra but that is what you should embrace." Irina softly told her "Relax and let it happen next time. Once you have experienced it you won't understand why you tried to resist. Trust me."

"Okay, but not now please, perhaps later today?"

"Anytime you're ready Petra." I assured her "Just say the word."

"Thanks, both of you. I'm sorry I broke off your love-making, I'll leave you alone so you can continue without me."

"I think you should stay and watch instead." Irina suggested "See me come, see Peter come. Then you'll know what to expect when it happens to you. Is that okay with you Peter?"

In all honesty I was far from sure I wanted an audience when having sex but Irina had after all been present when I tried to get Petra off. It was just that I hadn't thought about it at the time.

"Anything you want." I said.

- - - - - -

Irina came, I came, and Petra watched and moaned and panted in unison with us. When Irina and I lay close together relaxing, Petra kissed us tenderly in turn and left the room. Irina joined me in the shower where we washed and dried each other before getting dressed. When we entered the kitchen the other three sat eating, but they all looked up at us, smiling.

Petra went to bed early that evening. With me, in my bed, both of us naked. There was no hurry, and I did my best to please as well as tease. I did make her come and she cried from relief after each time. After that the actual intercourse wasn't a problem for her at all to my surprise.

Anna and Marija followed within a week and they were a lot easier to satisfy. Perhaps it was the practise I had gotten but I think they prepared by getting detailed descriptions when I wasn't around.

So everything was great after that then, right? I had four beautiful, sexy lovers to choose among, all of them willing -- not to say eager -- to be fucked by me? Right?

Close, but no cigars...

I had four lovers, true. They were all beautiful, sexy, willing and eager, also true. Me choosing among them? In... your... dreams!

They chose when and who, I tried to keep up with them. For another two weeks...

Let me -- to really make you understand -- describe the first couple of days of that first week.

Monday: I woke up with Irina on my arm. I licked her to two orgasms, then we made love. At lunch Anna suggested an afternoon in bed, my bed, and her and me in it alone. I got her off twice and we made love, and then she wanted 'desserts'. Petra felt neglected and insisted on an early evening: twice plus once before we fell asleep.

Tuesday: Petra again in the morning, then Marija in the afternoon. Irina in the sauna after dinner and Anna in my bed. A hat-trick, or what should I call it?

Wednesday: Anna was not there when I woke up but Marija was. Two plus one. Petra wanted to try something that afternoon so she and Irina took me to the sauna. Fuck, that was exhausting! Petra wanted a follow up in bed that evening but I fell asleep...

Yeah, that's about it: I never got a chance to rest or sleep enough. Also, I'm not Superman with constant steel in my pants, if you know what I mean. Two weeks of that and I almost begged Irina for mercy.

"Honey," I said to her one evening, just cuddling together in bed since I couldn't get it up "this isn't working."

"So I notice, but don't worry, you'll get hard sooner or later. I can wait."

"No, that's not what I mean. Or, in a way I guess it is. I can't keep up with all of you, your expectations. I need to rest, sleep, gather strength. I want sex to be a pleasure, not a chore, and like I told you before it's really you I want, singular and not plural."

That made her stop what she was doing, move her head away and stare at me.

"You want to stop helping the others? Now when they have learned how good it can be with a caring lover? That would really hurt them you know."

"I warned that something like this could happen, remember? Well, not really this but some kind of problem anyway. I'm only one, you are four. Morning, day, evening and night, it never ends. Look, I care for all of you but it's you I love Irina. I don't want to hurt the others but I can't go on like this. If it was once a day at least, or one of you each day and if I could set the pace."

"But you're a man! Don't you want to fuck day and night?"

"You still haven't understood, have you? Sex is good, great even, but I need an emotional tie and also I need a break at times. I do have that tie to Anna, Marija and Petra too, of course I do, but not the same way as with you. If you said 'no' I could certainly get emotionally tied to any of the others but it would still be one of them, and not in the same way as with you."

"Okay, I guess I can accept that but they need this too, the way you make them feel. Sure, I would love to be the only one for you but that is not an option."

"And it's not an option for me to be fucked day and night like this. Something has to change."

"Can we talk about this tomorrow, and get some sleep now instead since you're obviously just as worn out as you say you are?"

"Yeah, I guess I prove my point, don't I? I'm sorry that it is to you though Irina."

A couple of tender kisses, good-night's said in unison, then we settled down to sleep close together.

- - - - - -

My morning wood stood hard and proud when I woke up but for once I was alone in my bed. Ironic wasn't it, that I got what I had wished for?

I lay there thinking about our relationships -- as a group and mine with each of them individually -- and became none the wiser from it. I knew for sure that I was right about me being inadequate, but I also recognised that I would miss being with Petra, Anna and Marija too. The bond between us was too strong to be taken lightly.

In the end I got out of bed, showered and dressed. Exiting my room I saw Anna come out of the kitchen. Upon seeing me she hurried her steps to reach me, embraced me in a bone crushing hug and locked lips with me. The kiss went on and on, and before I realised it I had my arms around her too, answering the kiss with feeling.

"Good morning Peter." was all she said when letting go of me.

"Good morning Anna. That sure made it a good morning for me."

She winked an eye, smiled and left for the shared bathroom. I continued on my way to the kitchen where the others sat around the table. They looked up at me, and Marija who was closest stood and did what Anna had done seconds earlier. When she had finished she sat down and was replaced by Petra.

"Good morning Peter." Irina said happily.

She didn't get up, didn't hug or kiss.

"Good morning. May I ask what's going on? Not that I'm complaining in any way but this was far from your usual morning greetings, Irina being the only exception."

"You may ask but must wait for explanations." Marija told me "You and Irina talked last night, we have talked this morning. Later we will all talk, but not now. Not about that at least."

With Christmas soon to come we got started with preparations: cleaning the house, decorating, baking and cooking. Not once did I get a suggestion of sex, not once. By three in the afternoon when we sat down for coffee and still-warm cookies I would more or less have been raped any other day the last two weeks. Nothing, not even a hand on my crotch or ass in passing.

"Okay, let's talk then." Irina said as the coffee-break came to an end "Are you happy with our behaviour today Peter?"

"Your behaviour? Well, yeah, I'm always happy with you!"

"Always? That's not what you said to me last night."

"Yeah, well... okay, I'm happy with your behaviour, but Irina, I don't know if this covers what I really meant. My point is that I can't please four women day and night, and then there is the emotional and ethical sides of it. I love you all, I hope you know that, but for me it is unethical to fuck around when you have found the one you want to marry and start a family with. Eh... it's unethical to fuck around, period, I mean."

"Wait a second now!" Petra hurried to follow up when I went silent "What you just said sounded to me as if you were about to propose to someone. Are you? Who is it since you never go away or date anyone?"

"Fuck!" I said with feeling.

"Fuck?" Irina smirked "What do you mean with 'fuck' for answering questions?"

"It means 'FUCK!'. I wasn't about to go public with it yet, especially since I'm far from sure what the answer will be."

"Oh?" Marija contributed "You think this woman will say no to marry a handsome, wealthy, virile, kind and caring man like you? Then I think you should stop seeing her, because she's obviously crazy."

"Thank you for..." I started but was cut off by Anna.

"I don't know about virile now." she stated "He couldn't get it up last night with Irina, blaming it on too much sex. I mean, what? We're only four after all, not forty. And he wants to cut us off entirely, so caring is wrong too since he knows what it means to us."

"But..." I tried again but was cut off once more, by Irina.

"He is handsome, wealthy and kind though, and a great lover when his equipment works. Hell, I wouldn't turn him down if he proposed to me. A prerequisite or two perhaps to make sure he really wanted me, but nothing he couldn't handle for sure."

"Yeah, well, a pity it won't be any of us. He sure wouldn't marry a former whore would he?" Anna concluded with a wide grin.

Why did I get the feeling they knew my thoughts and was teasing and provoking me to spit it out? It worked too.

"Okay!" I shouted "If you can shut up I'll say it then!"

Shut up they did: you could have heard a feather fall to the ground...

"I've said it before but I'll say it again: none of you were whores! You were victims. It wouldn't matter anyway but let's stick to the facts. It is also a fact that I love you all, and if the first girl turn me down I might try with another. With that said I hope I only need to ask once: will you marry me Irina?"

"Well, there are those prerequisites of course..." was her calm reply "Two of them to be precise. First of all the other girls stay with us for as long as they want."

"Of course they will." was my answer.

"And you treat them as secondary wives in every way. That includes sex, and babies if they say so."

"Now hold it just a second!" I protested "Too much sex was the reason why we had to talk in the first place, and babies... Fuck!"

"We have talked like you surely understand Peter." Irina continued "We all understand that you can't keep up with all of us and we're prepared to cut down on our rations. If I agree to your proposal I will have first dibs at all times since I will be the official or 'primary' wife. That is, for the first two months after the wedding. After that the others get one day each week when they decide and I get the other four. If you're not up to it you're not, simple as that."

"Okay, that seems reasonable with those last words added, but babies?"

"Yeah, we will be one family after all, though they can't all be official wives. Man and wife sleeping together may result in babies."

"There are contraceptives you know? I've used condoms or has pulled out after all."

"You have but we'll get on the pill instead. We have decided that two babies each is allowed though, not demanded but allowed. I will be the only one the first year but after that it will be open for all."

Can you understand that I hesitated? Four wives -- primary, secondary or unofficial be damned, it would be the reality after all -- and possibly eight kids? On the other hand I did love them all and especially Irina. It was her -- or their -- demand so I had only to agree or forget about it.

"I have one demand if I agree to this," I said therefore "and it's not negotiable."

"And? What is it?"

"You tell Jenny and explain all the reasons! She'll either love it or go totally ape, I can't say which, but it's your conspiracy and you'll handle her."

"Deal!" Irina laughed "So, propose again under these conditions!"

"Will you agree to marry me Irina?"

"Yes, absolutely!"

"And so do we, unofficially." the others agreed, and that was that.

- - - - - -

With Jenny being a pastor, and Christmas being a major event for Christianity, there was no way she would come visit us, of that I was certain. To tell you the truth it was a relief for me with what we had to tell her.

The five of us went to early morning mass the 25^th as is the tradition. We had decided to not celebrate with gifts or anything the 24^th which is the Swedish custom, but we did eat the traditional 'smorgasbord' at least.

So, five minutes to six in the morning we stood at the back of the village church to listen to pastor Martin's sermon. The church was packed with people to the last seat and we weren't the only one's standing either. The bell's chimed, and as the last 'din' echoed from the tower the organ came to life.

With all the people in front standing up to sing the hymn our vision was blocked, but I couldn't hear pastor Martin's strong deep voice leading the song. The song ended and the organ stopped after an outdrawn last chord. People took their seats and things quieted down with only the occasional clearing of a throat.

"A baby was born..." a powerful voice started at the front of the church somewhere, and that was the only words I heard for quite a while.

It wasn't pastor Martin's voice, far from it, but it was familiar to me. Strong, convincing, able to cut through any loud crowd at will. How the hell... sorry, how in God's name could it be that Jenny was there? What the fuck!?

Like I have stated before I'm not particularly religious. I have a belief that mixes quite well with the Swedish state church from a philosophical point of view, and the few times I visit a church I tend to listen to the sermon. This time I didn't.

Why was Jenny there instead of Martin? Had something happened to him? Even so, why Jenny? She had her own congregation to tend to, her own church to hold her sermons in. And since she was in this church she would surely visit us when she had the time. Then Irina would tell her about us and all hell could break loose. Why hadn't she already told me she was coming in the first place?

Like that my thoughts wandered endlessly until the final psalm. When it ended and people started to move to the exit, so did we, and there by the door she stood shaking hands with every single person: Jenny.

"Go with God." she told one.

"God be with you." she told the next.

Though we started close to the doors it took us a while to mix in with the crowd, and Jenny insisting to shake hands slowed the progress a lot. Finally Anna was next in line, followed by the rest of us.

"You already Ride With God, child." Jenny said with a huge smile.

Irina was next.

"You are blessed, sister." was Jenny's words to her.

I followed and Jenny took my hand in hers. She also embraced me and whispered in my ear:

"Screw this up and I will talk to God about a fitting punishment Peter!"

Fuck women who talk about us guys when we're not around!

- - - - - -

It took Jenny until the 27^th until she arrived at my house. By then I already knew that they had talked over the phone several times. Most of the times I had been in bed with one of my 'wives-to-be', something that apparently had been discussed too.

Jenny, of course, had her own demands to agree to it. Yeah, I know that she really had no say in the matter but then again I do know her good and bad sides.

She insisted that she would be the officiant of course, and she refused to mention anything about 'secondary' wives, also of course. Apart from that she agreed to - without words but in spirit -- join us all together if we swore to be faithful for eternity beforehand.

Her last demand was to be the Godmother of the first child of each couple. Well, last but one demand: she wanted to share our home too since she had got the job replacing Martin when he retired come spring. They had only exchanged positions temporarily during the holidays to let her 'get the feel'.