A Boiled Frog Pt. 03

Wow is right! This is a great story - very well written with loads of twists and turns

FANTASTIC!!!! I pictured myself as Chris/Tina throughout the whole story!

WOW, WOW, WOW what a fabulous story - beautifully written 5 stars for the pure pleasure of the enjoyment of your wonderful writing.

Jennifer

Truly gifted work. I have read literotica for years and never felt the need to comment. Your work, however, and your honesty has left me with a compulsion to say thank you. I have enjoyed this story more than any ever and actually feel like a part of it. I am glad you have found your element. It is only a matter of time before you take your rightful place at the head of the table. Good luck and I will be reading. 😘

This amazing story just keeps getting better and better. I really love the story line and the development of the characters. Obviously Chris/Tina is on a path of no return. The question is how far down this path Chris/Tina will go?

Veronica

This has got me intrigued wishing I could be put in Tina's place! Tina should embrace being Tina and love her new life! She needs to accept who she is now! I love it all with women helping Tina transform!

(I was going to cut this down a bit since I had already sent it over to you, but I honestly could not manage to really summarize. So apologies for what is a repeat for you.)

Picking up from our email, yes, Vonnegut says to be terrible to your characters. The point of difficulty is to reveal who a character really is when the chips are down. That is a good rule to live by, a story thrives on tension. With out tension there is no story, but conflict is only one kind of tension. Chris/Tina's odyssey to find themselves is already a tense story because of being at odds with society. Hell, just sorting out a reasonable intimate relationship between two powerful women without the genderplay is already difficult.

As such I do not feel like the suffering inflicted, yes inflicted, on Chris/Tina at the ending shows us anything more than we already knew about them. They might have gotten a little more comfortable with the idea of being penetrated, but much of what happens is them giving up all the agency they developed in part two. In trying to create a overwhelmingly difficult moment, you turned who should be the second most empathetic character into an outright villain as she gaslights and coerces Chris/Tina into things. That outright vicitmization is the kind of stuff I hate about the feminization subgenre.

Which reminds me of something that bothered me with the first part that I could not quite articulate. I am fairly certain now that Julie was not actually cheating on him with Lisa, but said she was to gaslight him into being more devoted and obedient. Which makes her whole arc seem much more manipulative, if not outright abusive. Especially since not wanting to cheat on her was the driving force of the second part until she gave him the go ahead to be with Lisa.

Anyway, I will say I started to read part four before submitting this comment because I wanted to see if the narrative had gleefully engaged with further victimization or not. I felt that you had earned enough goodwill with the outstanding two previous parts that I had faith things might turn around. Happily you yourself seem to have realized that you might have gone too far and part four was a lot of the pay off I had been praising your build up of. So some of this will feel...flat considering that, in my opinion, you have addressed things I am being critical of.

Coming off the high at the end of part two, starting with Chris/Tina and Lisa getting home and talking with Julie was a great decision. I was still reading this as a developing trio, where the goal is all three of them are together, so the debrief was quite good and representative of most trios I know. I do wish Julie had been more open about why she was excited by Chris/Tina's exploits, but it is conceivable she herself does not know how to express that. The power exchange between Julie and Lisa as Julie goes down on Chris/Tina was great, but I would have liked to see more happen around it.

As an aside, I should elaborate on something I do not think I covered as well as I could have on part 2. To me, there are very broadly two types of poly relationships. An open relationship, where a couple is okay with either having other partners. In this case the streams tend to not cross, so to speak, typically one's girlfriend is not also their partner's other partner. The other is typically a trio (or more), where everyone in the relationship is with everyone else.

So I was reading the driving force of the story as Julie and Lisa's intent on this turning into a trio so they could also get back together, but it becomes quickly obvious that it is more an open relationship arrangement instead where they pass Chris/Tina back and forth. Which is fine, but in that case, the lack of communication between Julie or Lisa and Chris/Tina is inexcusable. I mean, yes, the three of them are still trying to figure this out, but time and again Chris/Tina is blindsided by what their day holds and Julie's consistent, seemingly deliberate absences borders on being abusive. This is further compounded by it always appearing that Lisa and/or Julie have told the other things that are not communicated to Chris/Tina either because of negligence or outright willing deception.

And it starts happening in the very next scene with the breast implants discussion. It was never a topic on the table before now. Looking back over the debrief, I do not feel like Chris/Tina convincingly said they felt they really needed boobs to be happy which would have been the only time a conversation about them would have occurred. Yet, Julie and Lisa already have a plan for Tina's looks. Instead of creating a scenario where Tina submits to wanting implants, they just decide that it is happening.

The blow back from Chris here was sort of what I was looking for, though I wish it had gone a bit further. The realization that Lisa and Julie have been planning this for much longer than Julie lets on has still not dawned on them. At this point, I would not be surprised if even the instigating incident with the hair loss bath was their idea.

My first real discomfort point came here, when Julie's behavior in response was not of a partner, but an abuser. As she mollified his well deserved outrage and minimized his legitimate feelings. Perhaps that is because much on the conversation is summarized between her apology and arriving at Chris telling them how he feels, but they pretty much ignore his anxiety about it anyway. Further showing that they ultimately are going to do whatever they want to Chris/Tina.

To me the moment felt like it flied in the face of how things had gone up until now (though there is a reading that says this has been the status quo all along). Sure, Lisa had been insistent on their presentation leaving for Vegas, but there was already some understanding that Tina would be in full force the whole weekend. Aside from telling them what to wear, she let Chris/Tina take the lead on how they engaged with their evolving appearance. Lisa let Chris own being Tina and consequently fell for that sense of self-confidence.

Which is why the next scene in Lisa's office is so refreshing. This was the tone I expected from the segment. the playful witty banter of two people growing closer. That Lisa shared this with Julie was expected. That he was then as commanding with Julie in bed was an amazing role reversal. I wish that moment had been more than a summarized paragraph. The two of them having having a even short conversation about why he can fuck Lisa like a jackhammer would have been a great opportunity to ensure Julie was being shown as interested in more than just subjugating Chris into Tina.

The scene with Mitch was a great character beat for Chris/Tina as it showed just how much the feminine mannerisms have become second nature to them. Being someone who can tunnel vision hard, I can believe Chris/Tina did not realize what was happening. The role reversal moment with Julie is great, but you ruin it with behavior exhibited by abuse victims. This was a great chance to show that Jules was into Tina for more than just sex and thrills, instead you went the subjugation route.

At this point forward, Julie reads as antagonistic to me and that really poisons the story. Like, I know that people can be shitty. Being shitty is a mode of existence for some, but at this point there are two Julies. One who found a new spark with her partner and has sort of lost control as she got more and more out of her depth and one who has, from the beginning, been trying to explicitly create Tina. One has stumbled into being shitty and the other came into this situation as a shitty person.

And then we get to the Lisa day. It starts with her being pissed that Chris/Tina has not picked up the phone. It is unclear when it was decided, but if it was at any time while Julie was at home (because you do not mention if she is at the office late or not the night before), her not mentioning it is pretty shitty. Which is why it reads as more antagonism. The reveal about the office situation from Tiffany is further antagonism. Julie made partner because of his sacrifice to go with Lisa (though that turned out to be a treat) and is now (un)intentionally dismissing Chris as her partner or at least distancing herself from him. It certainly sounds like she has not had a history of sticking up for him before. Taking into account what things Lisa had said about him which Julie relayed over the phone as Chris/Tina fucked Lisa, this is a pattern of behavior designed to isolate Chris and leave him dependent on her and Lisa. It is abuse. Period.

I put the story down here. I honestly did not want to read further, but I held out hope this was a sign that Chris/Tina was going to step up. Instead, they hide from an awkward situation. That Lisa was not upfront about wanting to fuck Tina was a frustrating misstep which could have been a much more interesting character beat as he willingly agrees to play around by sucking on the strap-on or something similar. Like I said in our email conversation, penetration is not the only checkbox for an act being sex instead of foreplay. Chris/Tina giving Lisa a blowjob, especially with something that provided internal stimulation, could have been a great opportunity the continue the feeling of them having agency in their transformation. He is making a choice instead of avoiding it by hiding the dildo.

The anal play with Lisa is very well written and might be the best passage in this part. At this point I am still reading Lisa as bi-sexual, perhaps even more than ever. Aside from that, this whole day is a narrative black hole which could have been avoided with communication. Julie telling Chris/Tina that they have a day with Lisa tomorrow would have alleviated stress and proven that she is not actually deliberately being antagonistic.

I am a little upset about how Julie handles Mick. The conversation was not one of two partners, but a girl and her toy. She reads as having completely written off Chris. To her he is only Tina.

I am able to forgive some of the escalation on Sunday since it they agreed on a Dom/sub day, however, typically in a D/s relationship part of the preparation for such a day is the discussion of things the Dom wants to do. Julie's not discussing her want to do anal is a big violation of the trust implicit in such an arrangement. Granted, after chapter four, I realized that she has been winging it most of the time, so she probably had not done extensive research. Outside of that, the scene is really hot and well done. The following scene is, again, mostly shitty because the lack of communication. As is the rest of the story, really.

Chris/Tina's reward for finishing her car is a mystery day of ratcheting up the feminization to forced levels. Their encounters with Lexi and Amanda are kind of awful, but they are people acting on assumptions about Chris/Tina. I feel like much of the stress from the day would have been assuaged with, you guessed it, communication.

Seeing Ash come back is mixed. I like her as a character, but her being hot for Tina is just as uncomfortable for me as it is them. I had honestly forgotten about Deidre and leaving the ending hanging on someone "outing" him was the actual kind of tension I wanted out of this story.

Sorry for this novel, but you said you wanted feedback, so I figured I would be verbose. Hopefully you still want to talk to me after this one.

Thank you for the shout out, Noobdude! I don't know if I could say that I'm out of your league though. You stand pretty high on your own regard. Keep up the good work.

I just saw the new chapter post and I'm going to dive into that tonight. I'm excited to see where it goes.

SoB

I think I must have wrote that part poorly. Julie is NOT having a relationship with Tiffany -- Tiffany only dreams that is the case. And Lisa happened in college before they met, continue through their courtship and stopped at their engagement. It started up again when Lisa moved back to town, but stopped when Tina was 'born'.

I would have expected some jealousy about wife and the receptionist. How long have they dated? And also her best friend?