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But as she lay there quietly teasing herself and masturbating, she heard the sliding glass door whisper open and turned to see her big brother walk out onto the deck, smiling broadly, stark naked and sporting an enormous erection that, from her vantage point, certainly deserved a trophy.
"Hi there everyone," he announced, beaming. "I'm back."
*****
Author's Note: Perhaps I should apologize for the length and for all the detail in this chapter. I know it's pretty long but there were some serious issues that needed to be elucidated so that, when they are finally resolved, everybody involved can understand and be onboard. Will everyone be okay with how things are turning out? Well, we shall see.
So Jack is home now and I think he will have a little something to say about how things shake out.
This next chapter is going to be a hot one. It is just about finished and should follow shortly.
I would like to thank you all again for sticking with my story and for your kind words. It is a joy to write, as I love all these wonderful, kind and horny people. Anyway, things will really heat up in the next chapter, which should follow in just a few days. So, thanks again for your time, your attention, your votes and all your well wishes.
HP
- COMMENTS
Teach4035 months agoI've read some great storties over the years, but this was one of the best. I hope to find chapter 1 so I can read how it all began.
Lenaptalmost 8 years agoLovely Story!
Very sensual and tender!
Again, I give you my 5*****Stars!
Looking forward to the remaining chapters and hope to see more Mother/daughter love in this loving story mmmmmmm
Wet wet kisses
Aunt Helena
55yo Lesbian Aunt from Portugal
Rasmatalmost 8 years agoVery well done. Anon does raise some valid points. The usual disclaimers,advisories to read all prior chapters,etc.would suffice. I prefer longer chapters, though.your short ones do cover all the bases. Excellent character and storyline development. Keep going.
Anonymousalmost 8 years agoI'm a big fan of detailed (usually multi-chapter) stories that have good character development and a good story progression. This story series in many ways has the potential to be one of those.
BUT
I have to agree with the comment made by Anonymous at the end of the last chapter that the constant repetition and recaps are becoming very off-putting.
This is Chapter 9 and is clearly marked as such. Any reader who discovers this story at this point, if they have half a brain, will surely realise that there's eight previous chapters that should be read before this one. You don't need to keep returning in such detail to events and scenarios that you've previously described.
It's a bit like many of the so-called "Reality TV" shows these days - each episode starts off with a recap of the previous one, there's a little bit of new stuff, then an ad break, then a recap after the ad break of what happened before the ad break then a bit of background stuff (often repeated from previous episodes) and then maybe a few minutes of new stuff before another ad break. Then repeat as necessary. So you find that (after you take the ad breaks and the recaps out) you've watched a 90 minute show which only had about 20 minutes of new stuff in it!
This last chapter was like that. Sure, 7 pages is impressive but, without going through a detailed analysis (which I can't be bothered doing), I'm guessing that only about 3 pages or so is "new" stuff.
For example, we already know the stories about how Jackie and Tish were conceived from previous chapters. You didn't have to detail it all again here in such detail ad-nauseum. Good cure for insomnia.
The problem with doing this so much is that you annoy your readers and throw them out of the story.
There's also problems with story continuity and inconsistencies which distract the reader from the story as well.
I'm looking forward to Chapter 10 to see how it pans out but if it has the same proportion of irrelevant repetition I don't think I'll bother to continue. Please drop the recaps and repeats and focus on the storyline moving forward and on the characters.
